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Pete's article finds a beautiful response in your commentary. Thanks for the reminder.

I really appreciated Pete's article and was getting ready to comment when my kids came home and I had to turn off the computer.

RC robbed me of my motherhood, but I have returned to it with more gratefulness than had I not experienced this loss. My oldest two remember the mom who never had time to "smell the roses" because the Kingdom was always calling.

After I stepped out of my apostolate, my daughter came home from school one day and found me waiting in the kitchen with my cup of coffee. We talked for about an hour and then she said, "Wow mom, if leaving RC means this, I think I like it". I knew right then I was doing the right thing.

So many opportunities to love were squandered on RC, but God is helping me make good of the time remaining. If anything makes me bitter it is this. Looking back, I can say I never really was happy.

Pete's message really hit home for me in a major way.

After a year of debating if I should leave the movement, and now over a year of being out, I'm beginning to struggle with something. I think the struggle is from the devil. Is anyone feeling more attacked now that you're out?

Anyway... ever since I had kids, homeschooling was always on my mind. When I was in RC and we got our own section in Philadelphia, the LC priest who was first assigned there was not pro-homeschooling at all. He said things to me regarding homeschooling that I thought were completely inappropriate since we had many homeschoolers in our section (not as many as in the VA or Baltimore sections). I always felt that it was strange that he was saying these things to me, but now I see that he was either playing non-homeschoolers against homeschoolers, or trying to get me to not homeschool because I didn't work & when my youngest was ready for school, I could devote more time to the movement. I took his spiritual direction to heart and didn't act on any of my intuition.

After leaving the movement, the urge to homeschool has gotten stronger & stronger. In December, I prayed: God, if you want me to do this, then you must change the hearts & minds of my oldest son (who all along was opposed to it), my husband & my monther. In April, all 3 of them said (at different times) that they thought I should homeschool. It truly was a miracle.

Now, though, as our first year of homeschooling is coming to a start, I'm beginning to feel guilty for pulling back from all of my volunteer activities. I know that God wants me to homeschool, but I feel like the devil is making me feel guilty & selfish for not serving others outside my family.

In June, I got a strong message from God saying that my family was the most important gift from Him and the most important aspect of my life, but as time goes by & I don't feel any consolation, the devil gets in with his undermining ways. I can't tell you how many volunteer activities I "quit."

I truly think that RC/LC is not from God. It subtly takes people away from their families all the while telling them that they're serving -- something God wants them to do. That's how the devil works, not God.

I have a friend who's still in rc. She's definitely drunk on the Kool-Aid. We're in a book study together & everytime someone mentions that staying home & serving our families is so important and all the other volunteering can become detrimental, she gets overly defensive saying that volunteering with the kids teaches them and shows them that family is important. It's very interesting to see her defend her position of being out & about & supposedly serving everyone else while dragging her kids from one place to another in a constant rush.

I'm sorry this is so long, but Pete's post really got me & I'm so appreciative to be validated at a time when I feel as if I'm being attacked by the devil. I'd love to hear if anyone else is suffering from a similar problem. I offer up my issues for the souls of those trapped in LC/RC.

m: these are attacks from YKW and need to be renounced. After listening to years of anecdotes from struggling RC's (esp. women) I came to the conclusion that the Legion promotes schooling for the standard two reasons it promotes everything: recruiting and fundraising. The funds come through tuitions, the mothers are available to volunteer at the school and recruit other women (esp. the unsuspecting families who come to the school).

There was even a struggle when FAMILIA was being written. Remember that in Year One, Familiaris Consortio is covered, which includes the question of contraception. The Sellors had to fight hard to include that in the curriculum because the Legion wanted it slid to Year Two (by which time the women would have already been recruited into RC and away from the rest of the program). I have even heard that the LC advice in the confessional is not aligned with the Church's teaching on openess to life -- for the ulterior motive that pregnant and lactating women don't make good soldiers for their Kingdom. (Please! no one used those words -- that is my conclusion.)

The nerve hit by Pete's piece is a good indication of the perversity of apostolate. Remember: Mama Maurita was always out helping the poor (as many saints were) while Maciel was (ostensibly) home getting abused by the farm hands. Perhaps that's why MM wrote the methodology this way: more mothers out saving the world, the more children available to him and his dreck.

Way off topic, but if you click on the following picture and squint into the upper-right hand corner:

Those four blurs behind the guy in the white sweater are my three oldest and me.

M, one of the saints most hated by the devil is John Chrysostom. The reason being that God inspired him to write the Divine Liturgy, which the devil finds most unpleasing for its devotion to the Holy Trinity and the Blessed Mother.

Here's what St. John Chrysostom has to say on the topic of your vocation as parent. (He's speaking to fathers, but it applies equally to mothers):

"Therefore I beg you to take care for the good upbringing of your children. First of all think of the salvation of their souls. God has placed you as the heads and teachers over your families. It is your duty to watch, and to watch continually after the behavior of your wife and children. Listen to St. Paul. If your wives, says he, want to learn anything, let them learn it from their husbands. Educate your children in the teaching and instructions of the Lord (cf. I Cor. 14:35, Eph. 6:4). Imitate Job, who continually looked after his children and offered sacrifices for mercy towards any secret misdeeds they might have committed (Job 1:5). Imitate Abraham, who concerned himself less with the acquisition of riches than with the keeping of God's law by every member of his house, and about whom the Lord witnessed: For I know that he will order his sons, and his house after him, and they will keep the ways of the Lord, to do justice and judgment (Gen. 18:19). David, when he was near death, wanted to leave Solomon the surest inheritance; he called him to himself in order to repeat the following wise instructions: that the Lord may confirm his word which he spoke, saying, f thy children shall take heed to their way to walk before me in truth with all their heart, I promise thee, saying, there shall not fail thee a man on the throne of Israel (III Kings 2:4). These are the examples that we should follow during our lives and with our final breath!

"If good fathers would strive to give their children a good upbringing, then we would need neither laws, judges, courts, nor punishments. Executioners exist because we have no morality."

In short, if every mother and father fulfilled his or her duty as Christian parent, the Church would have little need of apostolate outside of the family.

P.S. While I'm writing this, my three-year-old son is sitting next to me, playing with his toy school bus, and singing the Cherubic Hymn from the Divine Liturgy according to St. John Chrysostom.

Giselle & Pete, Thank you so much. I will pray to St. John C! This is so helpful.

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